Spiceonomics - Navigating Miami Spice, 2013 Edition

With August upon us, it's that time once again: Miami Spice. Now in its twelfth year, Miami Spice remains something of a culinary version of Russian Roulette: you might have a very good meal that's a great value at a restaurant that's excited to offer it to you; or you might have a mediocre meal that's not very different from the restaurant's regular prices, served by a resentful and begrudging waitstaff who are not impressed by your 15% tip on a $33 per person tab.

How to tell the difference? Over the years I've repeatedly proposed and refined three basic rules by which to approach Miami Spice:

(1) there's no reason to bother with restaurants where the Spice menu is not a meaningful discount from their regular prices (though, by all means, go to them if you like them; just don't do so because they're offering a Miami Spice menu);

(2) the infamous chicken breast / farmed salmon / churrasco (or substitute short rib) "trifecta" is usually a tell that a restaurant doesn't have its heart in it; and

(3) look for food that actually interests you. If a restaurant doesn't excite you the other ten months of the year, it is unlikely there's going to be something really inspiring on their Spice menu.

To those three basic rules I would add a couple corollaries:

(a) Tip on the value of the meal, not the price. If you're dining at a place where the Spice menu is a meaningful discount from their usual going rate - i.e., if your $33 meal would normally cost $50 - be a sport and drop a $10 tip. The servers are working just as hard as ever.

(b) There's no rule that everyone at the table has to order the Spice menu. (Well, except at some places like Pubbelly where they assume everyone is sharing and offer multiple small plates) Consider it an opportunity to do a little splurging and dollar-cost averaging at the same time, so you can eat at a high-end place without completely breaking the bank.

Last year, rather than just say "Here are 10 places to go for Miami Spice," I plotted out a "Week of Spice" - seven actual lunches and dinners that I'd want to eat from the universe of Miami Spice menus. Even though I didn't actually eat all those meals, I still like the format, and will do it again here. Once again, these are not the complete menus of any of the places listed, only the things I thought sounded most interesting. And once again, I've not actually tried any of these menus yet, so caveat emptor, etc. (though for the most part these are restaurants I know and would generally trust).

(continued ...)

Like last year, Miami Spice now has two categories of restaurants: "Fine Dining," with $19 lunch and $33 dinner menus; and "Luxury Dining," with $23 lunch and $39 dinner menus. And after a year, I still can't remember off the top of my head whether "Fine" is better than "Luxury." Nonetheless, I've chosen a "Luxury" and "Fine" dining option for each day of the week, as well as a Lunch option.

As a side note: the new format of the Miami Spice website is an absolute abomination, just horrible for customers and restaurant owners alike. Most egregious: there is no way whatsoever - even clicking the link that says "View All Participating Restaurants" - to actually, well, view all participating restaurants. Instead, you are forced to scroll through the list, five fifteen (no, it's back to) five at a time. So if you want to find out all of the 197 restaurants that are participating, you will have to click, at a minimum, thirteen forty times. If you actually want to see the menu of any of those places, you'll have to click at least twice more for each one - once to click on "View Details," then another time to view the menu. Oh, and also - it doesn't appear to save "Favorites" between browser sessions. Other than that, it's just great.

It is hard to imagine a system that is more user-unfriendly while simultaneously obscuring the visibility of all the participating restaurants (each of whom has paid thousands of dollars to participate in the program).

UPDATE - Looks like they have tweaked the website, which now has a complete list of all participating Miami Spice restaurants. Bravo.

All the more reason to have a guide (be sure to go all the way through, as some of the best are saved for the end):

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MONDAY

Lunch - Restaurant Michael Schwartz (South Beach)

Grass Fed Beef Carpaccio

Parmesan, preserved lemon, capers, arugula

Harvey Cedars Fish Stew

Saffron aioli, parsley croutons

Corn and Blueberry Bread Pudding

Buttermilk gelato, candied pistachios

Dinner - Bazaar (South Beach)

Keuh Pai Ti

Singapore's favorite street food, shrimp, peanuts, chili sauce

Mediterranean Mussels

Olive oil, sherry vinegar, pimento

Embutidos Platter

Served with Catalan-style toasted bread, tomato Ibérico ham, Ibérico loin, chorizo

Sautéed Shrimp

Garlic, parsley, lemon, guindilla pepper

Pan con Chocolate

Chocolate cream, cocoa crumble, brioche ice cream, olive oil

(Note: Bazaar offers a choice of one "starter" and three tapas items per person, so two people could have double the variety, with several additional items included in the Spice menu)

$33 Dinner - Tongue & Cheek (South Beach)

Cauliflower Panna Cotta

With pickled vegetables

Florida Grouper "Cheeks and Chips"

With malt vinegar

Cracker Jack Milkshake

Macadamia nut and caramel, chocolate brownies

TUESDAY

Lunch - DB Bistro Moderne (Downtown)

Squab Ballotine en Croute

Little gem lettuce, shaved radish, roasted shallot vinaigrette, pistachio oil

Lobster and Shrimp Roll

Bibb lettuce, crudités, tarragon dressing, pickled red onions, dirty old bay chips

Chocolate Cremoso

Hazelnut biscuit, passion fruit, gianduja ice cream

Dinner -The Dutch (South Beach)

Grilled Octopus

Local cranberry beans, tomato, black olive

Crispy Duck Confit

Roasted almond spaetzle,foie jus, pickled cherries

Warm Pecan Pie

Cinnamon anglaise, vanilla chantilly

$33 Dinner - Pubbelly (South Beach)

(no menu posted, though choices are listed in this Short Order post)

Croquetas

Short rib, porcini, mint aioli

Duck and Pumpkin Dumplings

Orange, almonds, cinnamon, soy brown butter

Pastrami and Sauerkraut Dumplings

White cabbage, soy, 1000 island, caraway powder

Pork Belly

Kabocha squash, butterscotch miso, corn powder

Pork Cheeks

Ricotta gnudi, crispy ham, green peas, wasabi butter

Green Beans

Tamari soy, mustard, almonds

(Note: I believe, though it's not clear, that Pubbelly's Spice offerings are intended to be split by two people; otherwise that's an awful lot of pork).

WEDNESDAY

Lunch - Toscana Divino (Brickell)

Parmigiana al Cavolfiore

Roasted and purée of cauliflower, pancetta, pine nuts, raisins, parmigiano reggiano, bottarga, fennel pollen

Maccheroni Livornese

Maccheroni pasta, crab, tomato, raisins, rosemary and parsley

Panna Cotta di Mandorle e Miele Bio Thun

Organic honey almond panna cotta

Dinner - Michy's (Biscayne Corridor)

(menu not on the website, but available here)

Grilled Octopus

Chickpea stew, pickled vegetable salad

Roasted Wild Salmon

Romesco, ragout of summer vegetables, salmon demi

Michy's Bread Pudding

Raisins, cognac, chocolate chunks, orange rind, vanilla ice cream

(Note: go Wednesday to Michy's and you can choose between the Spice menu and the $39 "bottomless" fried chicken night!)

$33 Dinner - Blue Collar (Biscayne Corridor)

(menu not on Spice website but available here)

Marsha's Salad

Romaine, bacon, parm, radish, cuke, carrot, grain mustard

Braised Long Island 1/2 Duck

Lo mein, tart cherries, green curry

Key Lime Pie

Regular whipped cream

(Note: yes, I'm sort of breaking one of my own rules by suggesting Blue Collar, where you can probably routinely eat for about $33 a person, but Chef Danny Serfer is breaking out some off-menu things like the duck here, and will be changing it up every week, which gets bonus points in my book.)

THURSDAY

Lunch - Graziano's (West Miami, Coral Gables or Brickell)

Empanada de Morcilla

Sirloin Steak Tagliata

Baked sweet potatoes

Bread Pudding

Orange chantilly, roasted almonds

Dinner - Scarpetta (Miami Beach)

Pancetta Spiced Mackerel

Fennel and citrus

Agnolotti dal Plin

Lamb and minted bread crumbs

Amedei Chocolate Cake

Toasted almond gelato and salted caramel sauce

(Note: Value-hunters may resist ordering a pasta for a main course on a Spice menu, but keep in mind Scarpetta is a place where spaghetti with tomato sauce regularly goes for $24.)

$33 Dinner - Salumeria 104 (Midtown)

Piccola Selezione

Choice of prosciutto and two salumi

Coniglio in Tecia

Braised Florida rabbit with artichokes and Taggiasca olives

Dessert Sampler Plate

Tiramesu, salame alcioccolato, biscotti

FRIDAY

Lunch - Makoto (Bal Harbour)

Spicy Tuna Crispy Rice, Serrano Chiles

Seabass Robata, Ume Miso, Crispy Kale

Seasonal Parfait

Dinner - J&G Grill (Bal Harbour)

Fresh Calamari filled with Lamb Sausage

Smoked tomato-caper emulsion, squid ink

Poussin, Pine Nut Foie Gras Jus

Truffle fava bean succotash, chanterelles, house made raisins

Lemon Cremeux

Microwave sponge, greek yogurt, green apple sorbet

(Note: Poussin? Isn't that chicken? Well, yes. But Chef Brad Kilgore, who recently took over the kitchen at J&G Grill, made one of the best birds I've ever eaten at this charity dinner earlier this year.)

$33 Dinner - Macchialina (South Beach)

Swordfish Carpaccio

Broccolini al Cesare

Creamy Polenta with Spicy Sausage

Slow Roasted Porchetta

Vanlla Panna Cotta

With balsamic strawberries

SATURDAY

Lunch - Edge Steak and Bar (Brickell)

Corvina Chowder

Slow cooked tomatoes, saffron, parsley and chilli

Lamb Flank Sandwich

Baby cucumbers, pickled pepper chutney, yoghurt, wholewheat foccacia

Tropical Tres Leches

Pressed pineapple, horchata ice cream, pilloncito

(Note: Bonus points - Edge is a "Fine Dining" venue so that lunch will only set you back $19. Unexpectedly given its location in the Four Seasons, Edge is one of the best values in town.)

Dinner - Bourbon Steak (Aventura)

Sweet Corn Risotto

Brown butter, chanterelle mushrooms, iberico ham broth

6 Oz. Moroccan Spiced Prime NY Strip

Roasted cauliflower, capers

Bourbon Peach Salad and Profiteroles

Vanilla ice cream, caramel

$33 Dinner - Mercadito (Midtown)

Pepino el Pyu Cocktail

Traditional and Toreado Guacamoles

Ceviche Mixto

Octopus, shrimp, mahi mahi, tomatillo pico de gallo, passion fruit-serrano broth

Tacos Estilo Baja, Carnitas de Puerco, and al Pastor

Elote Mexicano

Mexican style corn on the cob

Flan de Cajeta

Goat's milk caramel custard, orange, toasted almonds

(Note: Mercadito's Spice menu includes 1 cocktail, 2 guacamoles, 1 ceviche or botana, 3 tacos, 1 side, and 1 dessert - and aside from sounding like a great deal, represents a welcome deviation from their normal, tyrannical "you must order 4 of the same type of tacos" policy.)

SUNDAY

Lunch - Hakkasan (Miami Beach)

Dim Sum Combo

Steamed mini char siew bun, crystal lotus shrimp dumpling and spinach beef shiu mai

Crispy Seabass in Orange Sauce

Stir-Fried Shanghai Bak Choi with Ginger Oil

Spicy sesame bean curd skin cheung fun

Mango Custard

Carbonated lemongrass foam, freeze-dried mango, coconut sorbet

Dinner - PB Steak (South Beach)

Steak Tartare Sliders

Truffle green mustard, parmesan

Pork Cheek Ravioli

Green peas, beets, hazelnuts

Buffalo Style Sweetbreads

Blue cheese dip, pickled celery

Brooklyn Sirloin Steak 5oz. NY Strip

Lamb Chops

Green pea purée, mint tzatziki, cucumber

House Fries

Chef's Daily Selection Dessert

(Note: PB Steak's dinner menu includes a choice of 3 starters, 2 entrées, and a side dish, presumably to be split among 2 people.)

$33 Dinner - The Federal (Biscayne Corridor)

(menu at the Spice website is wonky; look here instead)

Pig Wing

Blue cheese mousse, pickled carrots and celery

Crawfish 'n' Grits

Andouille sausage, corn, creamy cheesy grits

Sprouts

Pickled apples and onions, molasses vinaigrette

Good luck, and be careful out there!